addiction

what good are eyes if i cannot see? sweet silence, oh how sweet silence can be. always wondering and never knowing, oh how horibble it is to wait. you move slow like a movie as i rush forward to shake hands with fate. always watching from a distance, observing and wanting and learning. i try to turn away but this desire within me keeps burning. sick with the discomfort of wanting what i can't obtain. the feelings still remain, though there are some things that i wish away. some things simply cannot stay, but linger on for days and days. hope always finds a way to be promising, to hold expectations high in the air. i wish it all to stop and disappear. to care is to be weak, and i never want to live with fear. so i'll sit here in my misery enjoying every moment, oh how addicting it can prove to be without me even knowing it.