(never)

Summer passed us with blinding ease and I found myself in your living room wishing I had known you earlier in this lifetime. Perhaps we shared many things in another. The wind sweeps through the shivering trees, scattering sepia and golden leaves under our feet. I stare at an empty stoop where we once sipped coca cola from a straw inside an old glass bottle and smiled until our faces couldn't take it anymore. This town feels desolate when you aren't around. The letters you sent are starting to crumble and I can't smell your scent anymore. Your careful cursive makes my heart hurt in ways I wish I never knew. We once thought we were invincible. There are no days and nights anymore, just blue and black, light and dark. I haven't slept in weeks and I can't shed a tear because my body has become desperately numb and cold here without you. I don't believe in second chances, and I never want to see your sculpted frame dance through my doorway again. I'll leave tomorrow and I won't so much as glance back. At times I will imagine your hand on the back of my neck, the wind whipping through our hair. Pit stops and long conversations that end in our bodies fitting so perfectly together that the entire world fucking disappears around us. We would lay on the moist leather seats in the back of the car as the evening sun made my skin turn gold and your eyes a different shade of blue. But I will go down this road alone, listening to a tired radio that doesn't play the good things it used to. Eternally tortured by every second of your aching absence.